Mistaking Rest for Failure

We live in a world that thrives on productivity, getting things done and succeeding in all elements of life. A world where ‘settling’ is frowned upon. Many of us seem to work extremely hard to achieve a goal and then barely allow ourselves 5 minutes of pride, before jumping to the next goal. It’s almost impossible to relax, to live in the moment, to embrace exactly where we are.
We live in a world in which we proudly say ‘we’ve not stopped’ or ‘have been so busy’, yet shamefully mistake rest for laziness or failure. Are you someone that can relate? Welcome to the club, you’re not alone by any means! If you know me, or have been reading my blog for a while, you’ll know that I’m very big on to-do lists, exceeding goals, and basically just getting shit done! I never thought that there was such thing as ‘too busy’, but there is. I was. I kept my self so busy in fact, that I didn’t even realise just how unwell I had become.
In December last year, I was forced to face reality & agree to take time off work in order to get better. So what happened when I was forced to stop, to do the one thing that I’d always avoided? Hold on to your seats, because the impossible happened – the world did not end! I realised a lot actually. Not only did I realise just how unwell I had become, just how close my body was to giving up, I also realised the importance of rest.
I used to live by the term ‘fake it until you make it’. I would rush around getting things done, pretending that everything was absolutely fine. It wasn’t fine – nowhere near in fact. You see, the whole fake it until you make it thing does not and cannot always work. Taking time off for me meant facing up to the reality of my mental health, it meant me starting to face the biggest challenge head on, rather than avoiding that it was there.  I realised that my recovery is full time. There isn’t an hour that goes by in a day that I’m not working hard to battle my illness. It’s meaning that I can put the time and effort in to killing the demons that try so hard to kill me. It’s about allowing my body to rest, to heal from all the damage I’ve caused.
So before I end up going off in a whirlwind, what I’m trying to say is that something I once viewed as failure or weakness, I now see as necessary. A priority in fact. I’m slowly realising that me taking this time out is necessary to give me any chance of recovery. The uncomfortableness that I feel now will be outweighed by the positives of being able to return to work and doing my job well, but more importantly to be able live my life.
You don’t have to be battling an eating disorder or even taking time off work for this post to be relevant to you. It’s a reminder that saying no and putting yourself first isn’t just ok, it’s crucial! That might involve saying no to a night out, or declining extra hours at work so that you can have an evening to yourself – no matter what it is, it’s important!
You. Can’t. Pour. From. An. Empty. Cup. You may think you can, but it’s not sustainable and more importantly it’s not enjoyable!
I hope this post has encouraged an extra hour in bed, a long relaxing bath – or for those on a similar path to me, reminded you that you’re not alone and that the time, dedication and fight you put in now, you will thank yourself for in the future.

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